Life Clouded With Negativity? Clear Your View and Tell The Right Story

Ever get sick of the news? Its funny how the way a story is presented makes all the difference. The news tends to be full of negativity. Our lives are no different. Each day we choose to explain our life, in a story we tell ourselves. How do we tell that story in a way that will benefit us? It helps to take a look how it all starts and how we can take control of our reaction to every situation.

Master Your Story

Our stories create us. They define who we are and what we do each day. We all are telling ourselves stories, but are you recognizing the stories you are telling yourself? I know I haven’t always been able to. I think we get so used to telling ourselves stories that we don’t always recognize when we are doing it.

It can happen so fast and we may not even remember the story we told ourselves. We all have emotions, but they don’t just come from anywhere. They are created from our stories. When you see or hear something you tell a story. It can be either a good or bad story, but that then leads to how you feel, and then to how you act.

See And Hear

We see and hear so many things everyday. This is the base of our stories. This is where they get created. We see and hear good and bad. What are you doing with the things you see and hear? Do you let them drag you down, or build you up? The things we see and hear can come from home, yourself, your spouse, friend, family member, coworker, complete stranger, work, the store, or the park.

Examples: (each of these things can be taken to the opposite as well)

•  A dirty kitchen
• Cooking a good meal
• Waking up late
• Getting cut off in traffic
• Your kid throwing a fit at the store
• Receiving a compliment

The list could go on and on. So I hope you get the gist and understand that basically anything you see and hear leads to a story.

Tell A Story

You have now seen or heard something. What did you just tell yourself about what you saw or heard? Did you make things up or are they facts? Are you guessing and misunderstanding what someone really meant? I am not perfect and often times have a messy kitchen.

There are multiple stories I could tell myself about this one thing. I could say I have been busy doing other things, and life and kids are more of a priority then doing the dishes. I could say I am just lazy, a slob, and unorganized. I could pass blame and judgment onto my spouse and kids, saying they don’t clean up after themselves or that they don’t help me enough (Adam does is wonderful, this is just a possible story). Your stories will probably change depending on your day. The important thing is to recognize the story that you are telling yourself.

Feel

Once you have told yourself a story you are going to feel something. This again can be a positive or negative feeling depending on the story you told yourself. The story that you just told yourself is going to stir some emotion; mad, sad, happy, frustrated, hurt, annoyed, scared, incompetent, worthless, dedicated, motivated, or successful.

There are a number of emotions we can feel. Go back to my kitchen example. With the different stories told, I could have felt accomplished because I was getting other things done, happy and dedicated because I was spending time with my kids. I could feel worthless and depressed for being lazy and a slob. I could have felt frustration and anger towards my husband and kids for not helping more. The stories we tell greatly impact us and can change the course of a day, week, or month. Others do not make us feel happy or sad, YOU choose to be happy or sad.

Act

After we feel, we take action. Now that you have some type of emotion running through you, you have options. You can either let those emotions act on your life or you can act on your emotions. Are you going to let your emotions run you or you run them? This is definitely easier said then done but is so crucial. There are multiple actions one can take, such as silence, violence, snood remarks, ignoring, hard work, or lounging.

In the example I shared I could have acted in several ways, I could go on about my day continuing to be happy and getting things accomplished. I could have been rude to my husband and made snood remarks (which would make the situation worse), or I could go on a Netflix binge and feel more depressed and worthless for not getting things done.

 

As I have started using this strategy and thinking more about the stories I am telling myself, It has helped me to change the way I feel and act. If your story is a negative one, this can be a vicious circle that keeps going around and around. Stories, are just stories. Are your stories telling the truth? You are the one who decides how you feel and act. Take a minute and reexamine why you feel or are acting the way you are. Do you need to tell a new story to change your feelings and actions? As you take a step back and can recognize where your feeling and actions are coming from then you will be able to change your attitude and be one step ahead.

-Adam & Paige

 

P.S. Looking for a way to create a better life story? We not only have learned how to tell our story better, but we are now able to write our daily story the way we want it. Learn how we are doing it.

If this is useful let us know, comment below, or snap a photo of your adventures and hashtag it #Embrace_The_kids — We love to see the fun things you are doing and the adventures you are going on. Find us: @Embrace_The_Kids

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Inspiration: Grant Cardone, Dr John Demartini, Tony Robbins, Russell Brunson, Alison Faulkner- The Alison Show, The Original Power Couple, North Country Littles, Melyssa Griffin, REI, Osprey Packs, Deuter, Mike Clelland, Ultralight Backpacking.